Okay so I know that not all of us are blessed with knowledge of nutrition and health or even a brain for that matter but common sense is common sense people....
Firstly the Diner I work at isn't a Denny's or anything like that, it is very much geared towards the healthier LA lifestyle and so there are a lot of vegan and healthy options on our menu.
Today I served a family of three. The kid must have been no older than eight and the first thing they ordered were three oh yes three coffees, one for each of them . Now I don't know about you but I think kids are already overly hyper and out of control enough on their own without giving the little buggers caffine on top of it. I mean why oh why would you let your child drink coffee?! Thanks to your genius parenting this poor child is now going to be a coffee slave his whole life.
So i give them some time to look at the menu and it seems the woman knows what she wants and even though her husband clearly isn't ready she calls me over in my favorite derogatory way by signally to me across the room by clicking her fingers. I stroll over in my SLOWEST walk possible and get my pad out ready... She orders for herself and her now incredibly annoying cracked out kid and then crosses her arms and glares at her husband with an underlying tone that read something like.. "pick something now or i will cut your fucking head off". Clearly they'd been married a while.
So as the guy felt the eyes of his wife stabbing through his soul he looks up at me and says "what would be better for me to eat... the beef patty melt with fries or the house salad?" "Well", i said..trying not to come across as rude "that depends on what you mean by better for you to eat?" did he mean taste? health? what?... "Im trying to watch my girlish figure" he says with a "Im so funny and cute" look on his face. "Well, i say, in that case, I think Id go for the salad".
Dumb-ass! What the hell do you think? Its not that hard... A plate of leaves or a greasy cheese covered piece of cow in between 2 slices of bread with a side of deep fried potatoes? I don't know genius.. you wanna lose weight?.. Pick the fucking salad!
Now don't get me wrong, I am all for helping people and advising them when needed, i actually enjoy it but some people really do deserve to be unhealthy and fat the way they live. An example....At my next table there are three people in their early 20's, two of them are in decent shape and the other one is clearly obese. The first two order the tuna salad, green tea and a soup and the other one orders as follows; A bacon cheese-burger with fries, a side of blue cheese dressing and the mac and cheese with.... wait for it... A FUCKING DIET COKE! Now what i ask is the bloody point of that? I felt like offering him a side of treadmill with his meal, Jesus. It's like those people who order milkshakes without the whipped cream, like thats going to make all the difference to their calorie intake. "Yes Sir, i will make sure that the 1500 calorie drink you're about to consume does not have that sugary air foam on top of it". Are you serious?...
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